I am afraid of Mothers day

I think the stress of this upcoming holiday has been why I am feeling so depressed this week. Which is just so wrong, I should not feel afraid of the holiday I have looked forward to for so many years. Last year was hard because Joe had to work- then his family started WW3 over it. This year I should be overjoyed that he will be home to celebrate with me. Instead I am just waiting to see what they pull now. Either way it will be bad- either they pull something which will suck, or they forget he even exists like they have done for the last year, and I will feel bad for him. I may not want them in my life but I understand they are his family and he loves them.